A Table For 4…For SEVEN!

Has it srsly been since October since I wrote here?  Jeez, this is ridiculous.  Right now I’m mostly just writing to write – I can’t think of too much ridiculousness that has happened to me lately.  When did my life get so drama-free?!

In housekeeping news, feel free to check out my new and improved list of “Shiny Things.”  In addition to fun blogs you can check out a trivia podcast that people swear to me is funny but I’ve never listened to.  So now, on to something stupid that happened to me this week.

SO, Kt has finished her OT degree and had to take her board exam this week to get her license.  She’s completely awesome, so I’m sure she did just great, but either way, we all knew we needed to celebrate this huge accomplishment by our awesome friend.  So we scheduled time for Friday night and let Kt pick wherever she wanted to go for dinner, drinks, and general mayhem.  Kt’s poor brain is a bit fried from cramming it with information and then brutally tearing that same information out of it while taking the test, so she had trouble coming up with ideas for a place to go after the rest of us got off work on Friday.  So she went with an old standby up north.

Keep in mind, this is a particularly popular Tex-Mex restaurant that is frequently super crowded, especially on the weekends.  So we expected to wait.  But it’s no big deal – we’re celebrating!  The Gebs (that’s Kt and her husband Mark) arrived between 6:30 and 6:45 and requested a table for 7.  Seven.  The number you learned to count to when you were three years old.  They were told by the hostesses that it would be about an hour wait.  No big deal at all, we figured.  The seven of us hadn’t been all together since we got back from our cruise at the beginning of the month, there’s plenty to catch up on!

So an hour comes and goes, and we don’t hear anything.  Then about an hour and fifteen minutes after the Gebs had originally gotten there, the buzzer goes off.  Yay!  But wait: they buzzed us to tell us that they don’t have a table.  Oh…kay?  I don’t know if this is policy or what, but it’s kind of like calling someone up when you owe them money and just being like “Hey…I still owe you money, dude.”  It’s not necessary.  We didn’t forget that we were waiting for a table, we’re hanging out right by the hostess stand, actively waiting for a table.  The hostess then brilliantly tells us: “We have a table for four.”

Sha-WHAT?  I’m not sure what she wanted us to do.  We could try to SQUEEZE seven grown-ass adults around a card table built for four.  Or we could have a death match and only the four who survive get to stay and eat.  OR four of us could sit and eat while the other three stand there, then we all switch places and the rest of the group gets to eat!  I’m still not sure how any of these are a solution, but I want to poke that girl in the eye.

So back to waiting.  Except we had all gotten up when the buzzer had gone off, so this really obnoxious woman with two horribly behaved children and an indifferent spouse had already stolen the bench where we were sitting.  So now we’re standing around, pretty much hovering over the hostess stand, not trying to be annoying, just standing.

Thirty more minutes go by.  Drinks are ordered and finished.  Seasons pass.  Tex-Mex starts to sound less and less awesome but by now we’ve invested nearly 2 hours of our lives in getting a table and eating a friggin burrito so we figure we might as well stay.  We located the tables in the restaurant where large groups of people were eating and we started sending mental “Hurry the f up!” vibes.  The buzzer went off again.  Hooray!

The hostess tells us she has a table for six.  Can we put a chair on the end for our seventh?  No.  So it’s a table for six.  Ok – I understand being a busy, popular restaurant on a Friday, but if you’re not going to have a table for seven, you’re just not going to have a table for seven.  Don’t tell somebody it’s going to be an hour and then make them wait two.  And honestly, offering a group a table that they clearly don’t fit at isn’t a solution at all.  And Ben, who had gone to the gym and worked out with his trainer, was in dire need of food.  He literally couldn’t wait and was ready to walk.

They told us they were calling a manager over to comp a round of drinks for us.  So the manager, who is totally nice and seems infinitely brighter than his host staff, comes over and schmoozes us for a little bit.  We’re definitely not sold on waiting any longer, free drinks or no free drinks.  And then, suddenly, as if by magic, the manager gets us a table for seven.  Which happens to be a table for six with a chair on the end.

So…WTF?  Two hours later, we are escorted to our table, all seven of us, with a round of free margaritas (Sprite for me).  What a weird freaking night.  And I was way too tired for post-dinner mayhem, since dinner didn’t end until after 10:00.  And it wasn’t even that we had to wait 2 hours for a table that irked me so badly.  It was the “solutions” that we were offered.  I srsly have no idea how any of those would have been better than just saying “We’re really sorry, but it doesn’t look like we’re going to be able to accomodate you this evening unless you want to wait two hours.”  To quote Ben: “I’m never coming to this branch again!”


3 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Kathy
    Feb 01, 2011 @ 07:25:24

    Haha! Love it! It would have been interesting to see who won in a foody death match – I guess whoever was hungriest!!


  2. mandafire2219
    Feb 03, 2011 @ 16:52:40

    Love it Mere! I completely empathize with this post… Every time I go to that branch (keep in mind it has been like once every six months) I get the worst service imaginable and my group is treated like we are not good enough for service because we are neither hipsters or a sorority girls. It is definitely on the boycott list along with another Tex-Mex establishment at Duval & 183…


  3. Mere
    Feb 03, 2011 @ 17:44:31

    @Kathy: I *totally* would have won the death match! Haha. And Ben, who was about to eat a waiter bc he was starving.

    @manda: I didn’t really get the feeling that anyone was intentionally giving us poor service or anything and the manager who we dealt with was really nice and didn’t want us to leave, the hostess just seemed a little…incompetent. Ooh that’s a mean word! But her problem-solving skills were…eh, remedial at best. 😉 What’s the place @ 183 and Duval?


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